An unexpected turn of events, since this morning. I was rushing out the door to drop R to the station and I missed a step on the garage stairs and landed flat on the ground, while twisting both my ankles in the process. A doctor's visit and an x-ray an hour later, and the results are a sprain in the right ankle and a tibial fracture in the left ankle.
An orthopedic visit 3 hours later, and the fracture is confirmed and the sprain is pronounced severe. They put the left ankle in a cast and the right ankle in wrapping and a splint. With 2 weeks of strict rest and care, the sprain will likely heal itself. As for the cast, I need to have it on for 6 weeks. And that's how things stand right now.
I cannot begin to describe the challenges this brings forth in our life right now. R is running some major deadlines at work. Winkie's summer camp just go over and he has 2 and 1/2 weeks to go before school begins, which is probably a good thing in itself. Thambi has sensed the unusual change of pace in our lives and reacts to it with a dip in his spirits. I oscillate between keeping a solid, cheerful front, to giving in to the weakness of the pain and the helpless tears, at how we shall cope together for the next several weeks.
However, where a door closes, a window, as always has opened up. Several windows in fact, and many many small small panes, through which the brightest of light shines through to dispel the gloom of the darkest hours. What a lucky thing it is that it happened while R was still home with us. How awfully lucky that Thambi whom I was holding when I fell, escaped from the fall unhurt, because I had somehow managed to hold onto him in the process, until I reached the ground. How lucky it is that we have an angel of a babysitter and we could just drop off both the boys there for the day and have her care for them, food and all. How cool was it that I had managed to pack R some idli upma for his lunch and that in turn became our breakfast in the car, while we headed to the hospital. How wonderful and personal was my doctor and all the nurses and technicians I encountered.
There was a point of time when I was on the x-ray table and from inside sprang a prayer, waiting to find utterance from my lips....Please God, let it not be a fracture! Somehow, I couldn't bring myself to ask it. It was just way more comforting to submit and say...Your will, not mine.
How fortunate that I had the love of such a wonderful family....my parents, my in-laws, my siblings, my bro and sis-in-law, my lovely friends, my cousins! Just talking to each and every one of them and hearing the concern in their voices was balm to my wounded spirit. How convenient that we had leftover pizza which we could now heat up to have some lunch and keep our strength up. How completely lovely was the orthopedic doctor who saw me and empathised with my having 2 boys to keep up with. And the nurse who came to do my cast...oh! she had the most comforting hands that soothed the pain in my ankles as she bandaged it. R was patience and love personified, his bleary eyes giving away the acute exhaustion within, but never letting it get the better of him when it came to taking charge of things.
I know I shall be eternally thankful to my cousin in St. Louis who promised to come this very weekend to stay with me for the first crucial week, thereby lifting a heavy load off our minds. And thankful am I that my mother has a 10 year visa and is prepared to come at a moment's notice the instant we feel this is way beyond us. What an unexpected surprise and delight it was to see my neighbour from a few houses away (Roy's parents) and A & A show up without notice to check in on me. I cannot feel more loved than I am now. He has sent a lot of people and blessings my way all day. Another dear friend who lives just a block away took stock of the situation and bought us some quick groceries, despite her own imperfect health...some bread for our breakfast, some gatorade for energy and some bananas for a quick pick me up snack. Kind kind kind!!!
But surrounded as I am by these immeasurable blessings, my spirits do continue to dip every once a while, when faced with the prospect of using the crutches and going to the bathroom. The pain is sheer agony, and even more from the sprained ankle which I am now forced to put some pressure on, than from the unused left one. From time to time, I feel sucked into the worry vortex of contemplating life for the next 6 weeks and how I shall pull through it. R says to just stay firmly lodged in the present...thinking only about what I have to do for the next minute and not more than that. And I respond to his words because they are the lifeline thrown to me from the divine shores, not too far away. From time to time, I visualise God's beautiful presence, like He is in the same room with me, looking upon me, His hands raised in constant benediction, a smile forever etched in His face and I take heart. I know He deems it is time, to put all the spiritual theory I have surrounded myself with to the test, in the form of this intense practicals. Its time to rid myself of knowledge and acquire wisdom through action. So far, I am proud to say that I have done myself and Him proud. Courage under difficulty, and grace under pressure is possible and they are not just words I share with those that ask of it from me. I am now living my words and seeing the tangible effect it has on my aura and my strength.
My father in law tells me that this is my period of imposed rest. A time to pause from all that I have done and rushed to do, to just being still and silent. To regain, to recoup, to rest. I suppose that is it. For I would not have done it any other way. Once again, He has proved that phrase...ask and ye shall receive. Only, I forgot to add all the extra clauses to my request which may have ensured me a less trying time of it. :) Still.....it is time to take Him up on it with a smile and some cheer, and prove to him the strength of my mettle, for which He has prepared me for all this while....
Wish me love and luck for the next 6 weeks, my friends.....for I now face the Master, at His own game! :)